Discovering Who You Truly Are
Over the course of our lifetimes, each of us has been molded and shaped by the influence of family, society, and culture:
We complete school…
We enter the workforce…
We accumulate all of the accolades that signify accomplishment…
And at some point along this journey, we might sense that something is missing… We may even start to feel frustrated by the hollow promises of security offered by our culture or confined by the very environment that shaped us…
We might find ourselves asking, “is this all there is..?”
The Truth is Found Within
“The privilege of a lifetime is to become who you truly are.”
— C.G. Jung
The truth is that throughout our lives, most of us have simply been handed a hard outer shell to don as a uniform. We can call this the persona — the mask we wear to fit into the society in which we were brought up.
All the while, on the inside, we yearn to shed these constrictive sheaths of conditioning to discover who we truly are and what our potential has to hold...
This is where self-exploration comes into play.
The entire idea of psycho-spiritual exploration, including psychotherapy, is to slowly peel back the layers of cultural conditioning, discover our unique fingerprint, and create ourselves anew.
This inner exploration allows us to ask ourselves, “Who am I, really?”
Through this inquiry, we cultivate an ever-expanding and more refined sense of awareness of ourselves over time. Then, with mindfulness, we begin to connect with a deeper part of the psyche that observes our thoughts, emotions, and experiences—often referred to as the Observing Self.
These practices of inquiry and mindfulness help us to recognize the patterns that have been passed down to us by family, society, and culture. With this, we become able to courageously face uncomfortable truths and limiting identities…
We discover that most of our thoughts aren’t truly our own, but it’s likely that they have been shaped by what we’ve watched, listened to, and absorbed over the years.
We further discover that most of our emotional responses aren’t truly our own, but are conditioned through observing our families and surroundings.
And we discover that at the most fundamental level, we are simply human beings — children of Nature who were born as the result of billions of years of cosmic unfolding.
"You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars;
you have a right to be here."—Thich Nhat Hanh
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So then, with the realization that we are inheritors of millions of years of evolution and adaptation, how will we choose to honor and make use of this extraordinary inheritance?
In what way will we contribute to this great cosmic dance?
What kind of people do we wish to become?
The remarkable thing about this evolutionary unfolding is that each of us has been gifted a unique set of traits, interests, and passions waiting to be discovered. Our primary task, then, is to craft a lifestyle in which this unique version of ourselves can be fully and optimally expressed, free from the constraints of fear.
This process of becoming an embodiment of our innermost values and interests is what Jung called individuation — a wonderful creative journey in which we have the opportunity to sculpt our own lives like the works of art that they truly are.
“Individuation is the process of a person becoming himself, whole, indivisible, and distinct from others in his conscious uniqueness.”
—Marie-Louise von Franz
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As we develop our unique character to be in alignment with our highest values, we begin to recognize that individuality doesn’t necessarily separate us from the collective. Rather, every trait, talent, and passion we possess serves a purpose within the larger orders of humanity and the cosmos.
With this realization, we become able to use our unique gifts in service to those around us, moving beyond self-interest toward a deeper sense of purpose and connection. This stage of life is often referred to as self-transcendence, and it’s where the true substance of life reveals itself…
We are truly reconnecting to what Jung called the capital-S Self, or the greater collective consciousness that encompasses all of life. Self and other again become one single interconnected Whole.
We are reuniting with all of Life.
"The universe is a complete whole and each of us is a part of that whole, just as a drop of water is part of the ocean."
—Lao Tzu
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As we continue to experience life in the form of human beings, we are meant to be unique individuals living in harmony with each other and Nature, just as cells work together for the body to thrive. We are all inseparable parts of the greater whole of Life.
This is who we truly are.
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May you have the courage to expand beyond fear, embrace your individuality, and contribute to the world in your own unique way.
Max Kristopher Komes
www.MaxKomes.com
Max Komes is a Masters-level Registered Mental Health Counselor Intern offering supervised in-person counseling services in Pensacola, Florida, as well as statewide.
If these messages resonate with you, take the next step in rediscovering a life of clarity by scheduling a session below:
Meet the other truth-seekers and free-thinkers at the Clarity Culture — our online community space at www.ClaritySanctuary.org.
This writing is for educational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health providers with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. If you have imminent health concerns, please call 1-800-NAMI.
